10) She once emptied my catheter bag twice in one night. (That's love.)
9) Because I know, despite what she says, that I'm her favorite son.
8) My Mom is a bad mutha... SHUT YOUR MOUTH! I'm talking about my Mom. She's the man!
7) The most important 2 words of my youth: Left Overs!
6) She's my biggest fan.
5) Hallmark says I have to.
4) I don't have to have a pin number at the Bank of Mom.
3) I am the favorite son, right? (Eat it, you two.)
2) Three years ago she was diagnosed with the big C and has since pimp-slapped that CANCER!
1) She gave birth to me and my enormous head. Ouch!
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!
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