My Dear Guest...

"Welcome To Fantasy Island."

Really! ME TV (Check Your Local Listings) actually reruns Fantasy Island. It's unbelievable. It's like I went on vacation to an exotic, tropical island and fantasized about fulfilling one of my life-long dreams only to have an ironic twist shoved up my butt by Ricardo Montalban and and a raspy little midget in a white suit!

This particular episode guest starred Gary Bergoff, better known as 'Radar' from M.A.S.H, as a man who wished to fulfill his fantasy of pitching to the best players in Major League Baseball. His Wife doesn't really know about his fantasy, and guest spots by Tommy Lasorda and other big name ball players of the time make the cheesy story line. He strikes out 3 of the best players and then quits his job for a chance at the 'show' only to have his hopes dashed by Mr. Roarke.

The second story was about a middle-aged couple who wished to escape their lives and exist in a simpler time. Apparently Fantasy Island, among all it's exotic locals, also boasts a small puritanical town of, well, Puritans who live life as they would've in Salem, Massachusetts. The villian, Leslie Nielsen, rules with an iron fist and eventually accuses the newcomers of witchcraft for giving a child aspirin. The couple narrowly escape with their lives and Leslie Nilesen goes on to bless the world with the Naked Gun Series but, WOW, what a close call.

The best part of the whole episode was during the game where 'Radar' pitches in an impromptu All-Star game. Mr. Roarke and Tatoo sit in the bleachers and watch the wacky goings on. Herve Villechaize... Tattoo... Surly Midget In A White Suit... "Da Plane! Da Plane!"... is wearing a San Fransisco Giants cap. Midget? Giants? Talk about Irony!