Or at least that's what a Critic recently said about my performance on opening night of Wonder of the World! (I won't even go into my feelings on low-level theatre critics... maybe some other time.)
No Sparks!? None!? Wow, that's weird cause in the 1st scene she's so disgusted with me that she can barely even stand to look me in the eyes as she packs to leave our marriage! Our next scene together she's already sexing up some tour boat captain and written me out of her life! Even when she agrees to see a therapist in our 3rd scene she's only doing it to shut me up; there's no chance she'll take me back!
So how odd is it that there's no spark between us? Wow, it's almost as if we're not the romantic couple in the play! It's almost as if our marriage has fallen apart and my wife is trying to figure out how to rid me from her life! Wow!
Tonight, come hell or high water, I will make sparks between me and the the actress who plays my wife that doesn't want to be married to me anymore because of my deep dark secret! So thank you for your expert opinion of our show, nameless low-level theatre critic, sorry you seemed to have slept through at least half of it! Come back and watch the rest of the play and then write a review about how certain characters don't even seem to be Russian!
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