Waiter! Oh, Waiter!

I have developed a bad habit.  I have become a waiter, when I have always wanted to become a do-er.  I'm not sure when this began.  I feel like used to be good about going out and getting things done.  I need to change this.

Ah, but there is the pitfall.  If I focus too much on trying to get things done I won't, or might not be able to stop and appreciate all of the things that may be happening around me.  Yet if I spend to much time waiting for things to happen then I might miss some golden opportunities.  Also, I need to acknowledge the fact that I have done some things recently, seized some opportunities, and tried to make things better.

Hmmm, I guess I don't know what the hell I'm talking about.  What's new?

Today - my day off - I was listening to music as I worked on a script for submission.  (See I'm doing things.)  I was listening to music, as I often do when I write.  Sometimes the songs go unheard and other times they pop out and snag my attention.  Today as I was working on this script, this long term project (See?  What am I waiting for?) several songs were worth stopping for.  The 1st song was Tom Petty's 'Walls'.  It's a good song.  Later on 'Runaround' by Van Halen came on.  Another good song.  And finally, the song 'Burn To Shine' by Ben Harper played.  All 3 songs are good songs.  (All 3 of these songs are easy enough to find online if you care to listen.)  I cannot say what made these songs stand out - I had music playing most of the day - but these stayed with me and were worth mentioning for the way the made me smile, or shrug my shoulders, or stare away from the computer screen  and take a momentary break from the writing before forging ahead.

The script isn't completed but it's coming along...  Wait and see.

The Final Steps!

Two weeks of a three week run have flown by.  The audiences seem to be appreciating our efforts and the critics have had nothing but good things to say about The 39 Steps.  It has been a wild ride!

This is the 1st full length theatrical production I have worked on since Evie Sue was born, and it has been challenging.  An erratic rehearsal schedule, a full time job, and trying to spend quality time with loved ones has been stretching me a bit thin.  I can honestly say I am looking forward to the curtain falling on this production not because I am not enjoying myself but, rather, because I need to find a new normal.

When I stepped down, changed positions, at work a few months ago I already was in rehearsals for this show.  I changed stores, work schedules, commutes and everything whilst rehearsing the play.   Once the play ends it will just be the job, and the family for the 1st time since making the decision to step down.  I have no plans to work on another theatrical production in the coming months.  It'll be interesting to come up with a new regular-ish work schedule going into the summer.

There will be trips to see family.  There will be cookouts.  Visits to the park.  Day-trips into the city and hopefully a ballgame or two.

Here is a Hans Christian Andersen quote I used in my bio for this show's program.  "Just living is not is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom and a little flower."  That's about where I am in my life right now.

  

How Goes It?

Shorter commute, shorter shifts, and less responsibility.  I will say that it's a bittersweet change though.  I feel like I might have been a different type of manager, and maybe more motivated in a more supportive environment.  My last boss was not my favorite person, and had a very self-serving agenda.  Things are what they have become so we'll just roll with the punches.

I did recently visit the old store.  It was good to see my old co-workers/friends, show off Evie and reconnect.  I genuinely miss working with that crew.  It's weird to think about how little I see of them now.

Rehearsals continue, work goes on and eventually things will even out and we'll find a new normal...

Abandon Ship

The bell tolls for me.  3 times and then fades into silence.  It's time for a change.

Today will be my 1st day back in the Annapolis location of the National Chain of Neighborhood Grocery Stores that I work for.  For almost the last 2 years I had been commuting up to Towson to work in the store up there.  I was not enjoying myself - not the job anyway.  The nautical sounding title under which I toiled for that time was, for the most part, not fulfilling and a total pain in the ass!  My higher ranking 'officers' did not inspire confidence, and often times made the job more difficult.

Twice I actively sought a transfer.  Twice I was ignored by the powers that be.  A transfer would have meant a shorter commute, less gas money, more availability to see my family, and also a chance to try and see if maybe my doubts and negative feelings about the job were true or merely biased by my particular assignment.  Who's to say what would have been had I worked in another store?  I felt as if I was spinning my wheels; exiled, and let me tell you the view from Siberia is bleak.

So I have stepped down.  What does this mean?  It means I have surrendered my keys, and Hawaiian shirt.  I no longer have a nautical sounding title or any of the stress or BS that goes with it.  I am a worker bee once again, and I get a transfer.  (Shorter commute, less gas money, etc)

A recent meeting with my boss to discuss scheduling concerns, and issues I was having in general turned into me laying out all out on the line.  2 years ago when I accepted the promotion/transfer I was wearily optimistic.  Hopefully the opportunity would provide some financial stability, and make things better for my family.  It really has not done those things.  I had hoped to put in some time in Towson and then get a transfer to a store closer to home.  That did not happen either.  The ultimate goal for someone with my title is supposed to be taking command and getting your own store.  Early on I realized I didn't have that aspiration.  The powers that be decided that if I didn't want the prize at the end of the maze then I shouldn't be running in the rat race at all.  I couldn't agree more.

So today I go back to my original store.  Time has passed, things have changed and we'll see what comes of this new development.  I am being compensated for my time on the front lines, and hope that my clean performance serves me well.

On a more personal note, I am leaving Towson with many good memories.  I have met and worked with many excellent people in that store.  I connected with co-workers, and customers up there.  I formed some good relationships and met some truly wonderful people that I might not ever had met if I had if I'd not been promoted.  I once told a friend that I believe people come into your lives with a purpose.  Sometimes they're little, seemingly insignificant things but other times people really make an impact on your life.  My life has been significantly affected by people I have met during my tour in Towson and I count myself lucky to know those people.  I am notoriously bad about keeping in touch, but I hope to actively maintain those friendships.  A change of scenery will be nice but I will miss seeing those people everyday.  :(

The Steps Ahead

A few weeks back, I went to my 1st audition in a few years. Ever since Evie was born, and I've been working to support the family I haven't had much time to indulge in my writing or acting endeavours.  It's just how it is.  I don't have the time, outside of work, to commit to a theatrical production.  Or do I?

I auditioned just to audition.  The director emailed me asking me to come out, it's a script I love, a company I respect, and what could it hurt?  Dust off a few cobwebs, get up on my feet, read a few sides and see some friends.  So I auditioned, and got cast as the lead even though I am unsure I can commit the time needed for rehearsals and performances.  The director said, "Just say yes and we'll figure it out.  Just say yes and we'll make it work."

So I did.  This May I will be appearing as Richard Hannay in Dignity Players'production of The 39 Steps!  

So why now?  Why have I turned down auditioned for other shows?  Why do I feel like I can make this one work with my hectic schedule?  Because I really want to try.  My job is just a job, is not the end all be all of who I am.  I need to do something that I can enjoy, and something that might inspire... groceries do not fulfill this need.  They just can't.

Procrastination Used To Be My Problem

Now with a small child being exposed to countless germs and such in daycare I just can't seem to find enough time to get things done.  Picked Evie up, looks like pink eye, and there go all of my plans... such is life.

Bad Average?

So today we went to Carmax.  We test drove several cars.  Sara's car is probably not gonna last much longer so we need to find a replacement.  We have a less than stellar track record with our automobile purchases from private owners and then it hits me... we bought a car last year and the year before.  In the last 2 years we have purchased 2 cars and now, in the 3rd year, we will be buying another car.  Did I mention I hate buying cars?

Civic Duty... Again

Here I sit, once again, in a courthouse waiting to see if I will be selected for jury duty.  This is the 3rd time in the last decade that I have had to answer a jury summons.  Doesn't that seem a little excessive.  I sat on a jury in Chicago, sat through a selection panel in Baltimore less than 2 years ago, and now I'm sitting here for a 2nd day of selection here in Annapolis.

It's my day off and I would rather be out and about enjoying the day.

Poor Neglected Blog

I apologize to you, my blog.  I have been negligent.  I have not had the time, made the time, or even looked for the time to update your cyber-pages.  It's not like I haven't had things to share either.

Family members visited from afar.  Sara and I had another anniversary.  I started a post about our family trip to Minnesota entitled 'Land of 10,000 Frozen Lakes' but never posted it.  Button turned 2 years old earlier this month and I didn't post about it. Christmas has come & gone and I've remained silent.  What's the deal?

Well, the easy answer is lack of a reliable internet connection.  Ever since we became smart phone users we have not paid to have home internet.  It's so incredibly easy to be able check your email whenever you want, google recipes on the john, or IMDB actors while watching television.  Unfortunately, my phone doesn't work well with this blog and I have been unable to post from the palm of my hand.  Also, my old laptop did not turn on the last time I took it to the library with the intention of updating you, my blog.  But these are just excuses.

I don't know, blog, maybe I've outgrown you. Maybe we've drifted apart.  The thrill may indeed be gone.  I used to think I was soooo clever with my sarcastic, yet thought-provoking witticisms.   I used to be so sure of my writing and I would never have questioned the use of a word like witticism, but now I'm not sure I've properly used that word.  Also, let's face it, some posts aren't worth reading.  The brash young blogger with thoughts and ideas overflowing from within has apparently been replaced by the tired, working dad who falls asleep after reading only a few pages, and can't seem to find the time or focus to work on his writing at all.  The only reason I am able to update you now, blog, is because I am at the mechanic having the Taurus inspected, and am taking advantage of their free WiFi while I wait for them to fail my inspection.

Not the most inspired post,I know, but I felt as if I should try to explain.  The New Year is fast approaching and maybe 2014 will be a better year for us.  Hopefully I will find time to, not only, update you but also to get back to my writings.  (I feel as if my punctuation & grammar might be suffering from texting daily.)   So in closing, it's not you, blog, it's me.   

He Saved Everyone of Us

I got this from the library a week or so ago.  I am enjoying the comicstrips.